Snakes and Snails with Sugar and Spice?

I was so certain that the twins were a boy and a girl. I was definitely certain that there was at least ONE boy in there...I just knew it! Until the Dr. confirmed that we will be having not 1 but TWO girls! I think I am still in disbelief that he must have missed something:) But since he was pretty thorough in this ultrasound of them both, I'm pretty sure there was nothing that got overlooked! And both babies look great, which is always so reassuring. In fact, the Dr. joked that Baby A, who is giving us a thumbs up in the photo below, was telling us that all is going okay inside mommy's tummy (which is very nice to know given the fact that mommy has had a very hard time eating her vegetables during this pregnancy:)

I just remember saying "2 girls" again and again, looking at Ed to make sure I had heard the Dr. right:) I have to admit, I had tears in my eyes, because I had so hoped for another little boy. Now I am trying to figure out why I had my heart set on at least 1 boy...because I feel guilty for admitting that. Every time I put away Sam's clothes that are too small, I always felt like I knew that they would be used again for Sam's little brother some day. I could see Sam and a little brother playing and growing up together. The bigger question I've been asking myself is "Is it really another boy I was hoping for, or did I just have so much fun watching Sam as a baby that I want to do it again (focusing more on Sam as an individual rather than that he was a boy or a girl...does that make sense)? I worry that the two girls will have a great connection that Sam won't be a part of...I worry that I won't be able to handle the "drama" that most girls seem to naturally bring to any situation...and I worry that I won't be able to relate to the needs of girls as well as I feel I can with the needs of my little boy. I worry, I worry, I worry.
And then I see this little girl, Twin B, chilling on her back with her hand by her face...and wonder why I worry? Why can't I just enjoy the moment...just like she is in this picture?

When in reality, God always has a plan and a reason that I KNOW I will understand some day. I know I will love those little girls to pieces and will not be able to imagine my life without them. And I know I will look back and wonder why I worried so much...why I couldn't see that God gave us our children in exactly the right order. I'm praying that I can find peace with this knowledge soon so that I can let go of what "my plan" was and accept God's plan.